Pete Yorn & Scarlett Johansson: Break Up

"I Have a Dream..." - that's the kind of statement which can go anywhere. It could be a landmark speech on civil rights, an emergency trip to the washing machine or another attempt at giving Scarlett Johansson a music career.

Fast becoming 'the new Kate Moss' (only with more talent), the project came about after Yorn was inspired - during his slumber naturally - to record an album owing its heritage to the Serge Gainsbourg's 1967 and 1968 albums with Brigitte Bardot.

Oddly, for a duet, Johansson and Yorn have precisely zero chemistry together. You may as well dress them up in Panda-suits, lock them in a cage and yell at them to "breed, damnit, breed". Much like the Pandas, it's difficult to justify their continued existence - despite them being very very cute - when they can't even be bothered with each other. Johansson attempts aloof and sensual, but comes out with frigid and bored. Yorn tries equally hard, but is unable to muster anything out of the ordinary. He voice, while pleasant, is distinct in its indistinctiveness. There is no attempt at The Kills-style interplay, it is more like Johansson just turned up and recorded her parts to fill in the gaps while Yorn went for a slash.

It's not even as if folk-musician and Hollywood actress is an impossible formula to master. M. Ward and Zooey Deschanel have already set the template with their rather magnificent project She & Him. 

It's impossible to fault either of the two on any specific detail, their voices are both beyond dispute, the folk influence shines brightly giving earthy charms to their soulful vibe and the earnest lyrics turn the wheel well enough.

Yet, with the exceptions of "Realtor", the hilariously racist "Blackie's Dead" and the quirky bassiness of "Shampoo" there's all but nothing which leaps from beyond the humble page.

Johansson instead seems too concerned with upholding her screen-siren label, unwilling or able to offer anything other than cool professionalism. Yorn, for his part, lacks the experience to pull it all together. Instead of sizzling with heat as Gainsbourg and Bardot (yes, we've seen something made pre-1970: try not to faint) did, Break Up - rather than a duet - could be an extended guest appearance if you can envision the distinction between the two classifications.

Proof that sometimes you can throw talent at a wall yet only end up with a messy wall in need of re-decoration.